I’m a little later than usual in reflecting on the past year. I usually reflect on the previous year in the days around my birthday. It’s something about ending a year of life and celebrating the First Sunday of Advent, the liturgical new year for The Episcopal Church.
Last year–and the last two months in particular–have been pretty stressful and exhausting. I found myself wiped out and ready for some time off. I also found myself wanting to hide out a little. I grew a little tired of being criticized, judged, and gossiped about and even considered giving up my dreams the way I did 15 years ago.
But a dear friend reminded me that is the time when you should double down and be more visible, because no one should keep you from being who God intended you to be.
The last year hasn’t been easy. It slapped me with two unexpected surgeries and a lot of heartbreak, but I also accomplished some big dreams and experienced some moments of profound joy and gratitude.
I’ve had to accept and grieve some dreams that will never happen. I’ll never spend Christmas Eve in the kitchen surrounded by kids and grandkids. I’ll never have grandchilden to pass on hard-earned wisdom to. My husband and I will never have the family we dreamed of.
But I’ve also been able to revive dreams I thought were long dead. I’m a commercial model again after 22 years out of the business. I’ll be competing at a national beauty pageant in July. My dream farm is slowly becoming a reality, and I’m finally working on my second book and a new coaching business.
Through all of it, I’ve had my wonderful husband by my side cheering me on, protecting me, and loving me. The growth of our love for one another and trust and faith in one another gives me so much joy. I never thought a love or marriage like ours was possible and certainly never expected it in my life.
2024 was a year of transformation, of shedding off the skin of a life that didn’t fit to step into a life I was meant to live. It wasn’t easy, but it was necessary to grow into 2025.
May 2025 bring you peace, joy, and blessings!
