I mentioned in my last post that I’ve been thinking a lot about the lies we tell ourselves to make bad situations tolerable. One of those lies is that love is hard.
Love is only hard when you’re trying to force it in toxic relationships. Love is as easy as breathing when you’re in a healthy, healing relationship with the right person.
Think about your best friend. How hard is it to love her? Sure, it’s not all rainbows and unicorns, but you listen to each other, you care about each other, and you forgive each other.
You don’t think twice about having each other’s back. You have zero trouble having fun together. It’s easy.
That’s how all your relationships should be.
I told myself for years that my marriage to my ex-husband was hard because it was supposed to be. Because that’s what we’re all taught. Relationships are supposed to be work, right?
How about my marriage sucked because he was a covert narcissist who couldn’t love me? How about my marriage sucked because I married the wrong guy?
How about we start by telling the truth?
Now that I’m with the right man, my marriage is easy. Is life easy? Hell no! We have bad days. Shit happens. Sometimes, he yells. Sometimes, I yell.
But guess what? We always talk and figure it out. In the middle of a crisis, we find a way to have fun. We love each other. There is no walking away or trying to hurt each other. Being together is as easy as breathing.
Love is not hard!